Alright. I have snippets of stuff I want to say, most of it pretty damn funny, but none of it constitutes a full post. So here we have the 15 reasons I am worth dating in a really big font to fill up space.
1. I don't have the AIDS!
2. I'm in pretty good shape, so I can keep up when we're running from the cops!
3. I'm not your ex-boyfriend! What a crazy bastard that guy turned out to be.
4. I know every word to every song in the movie Aladdin!
5. If I don't "get" you, I will pretend really hard!
6. In 8th and 9th grade I got elected for student council!
7. I have great taste in music So you don't have to waste time making me mix CDs of "great" bands you want me to hear!
8. I totally put out on the first date!
9. I get bored of things that don't stimulate me intellectually so when you don't feel like talking I'll probably just wander off!
10. I can be pretty flaky, so you wont have to sacrifice any of your alone time for me!
11. I'm pretty hardcore. I once spent 3 days in jail for $5700 in traffic tickets!
12. I no longer race for pink slips on the freeways! (See reason 11)
13. Four words: Master Of Computer Solitaire.
14. I have no idea how to cook so anything you make will be received with exuberance and probably diamonds!
15.
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"Although they are only breath,
words which I command are immortal."
- Sappho
(610 - 580 BCE)