Every now and then (when I run out of stuff to bullshit my way through) I sort through the comments and messages in my inbox and I pick 20 of them to bullshit my way through. Ironically, these posts usually get the most hits. That being said, here now is the "Q & A" of Muden's mind.
I do not edit grammar or spelling. This is 100% real and it makes me sad.
1) Do you have read other blogs on a regular basis?
I don't know if you were trying to sound intelligent or you tried to edit your question and failed but holy shit dude. To answer your question, no. Hell no. Have you read some of the crap out there? Blogging is like Youtube except it's not limited by who does and does not have a camera. You get these people posting random pictures better left to Facebook or some other social site and thinking that it is going to entertain other people. It's horrible. Check out these examples. The first one is so full of win I actually saved it to my favorites.
The Wasp: "It's natural, darling, it's from the earth!"
Batman: "Yeah, well, so is uranium."
The Wasp: "Oh, I would never smoke uranium, they use it to make bombs."
Batman: "Yeah, well, so is uranium."
The Wasp: "Oh, I would never smoke uranium, they use it to make bombs."
For example, last night I enjoyed driving to dinner because there was a light breeze and the trees in my town look perfect in the wind. I got to have dinner with a new friend and had a delicious dessert.
2) Wut school did u go2 for writting? I think I could keep a funny blog 2.
Clearly.
3) You talk alot about dating and relationships, but you never talk about your own love life. Is there a reason for that?
I always talk about my love life, sadly the funniest posts I have ever made were my adventures in dating. What I refuse to discuss no matter how many times it is requested is what happens in the bedroom. When I stop discussing my love life you will know I found someone I care for and our relationship will always be private.
4) Your observations about relationship and how to treat woman are usually spot on. Ever think about giving dating advice?
This question would be a huge compliment if you didn't suck at grammar. I do not give dating advice. I am not here to help break some girls heart.
Actually, I just don't want the competition.
5) What's up with the random angry posts?
Remember that I am still the guy who grew up with goverment cheese sammiches and Attack Force shoes. I might say some real shit from time to time. Some people get mad and drive fast or beat their wives... I write. I assume you are thinking about me calling people out on a public forum. If you are grown enough to wrong somebody you should be grown enough to make it right. If you choose not to do that then obviously you are ok with what you did and you should have no problem with other people knowing.
6) Why do you delete old posts?
I have no idea.
7) Did that one girl really show up dressed like a hooker?
Yup. It was classy. More so because a group of people I know were there watching me entertain what they thought was a hooker. Word spread like wild fire and to this day I get dirty looks from my elders. Everything I write is true. It makes for good reading, not so much for my love life.
8) Where do you get your inspiration?
The first time I wrote a post (who else remembers Xanga?), I was told my style is sexy. I still don't understand what that means when I get it now. Lately I have fallen away from my style to please you ungrateful bastards, but I suppose that has been my muse. Knowing that I am able to create emotion and provoke thoughts that would otherwise be lost in the daily grind of your lives.
9) You said that you get paid too write. How can I do that???
First: Don't suck at grammar.
Second: Don't suck at punctuation.
Third: Figure out what your readers want to read.
Fourth: ????
Fifth: Profit.
10) Whatever happened to your "Adventures with Online Dating?"
I am so amazingly bad at online dating that it is almost pathetic. I started it after some people at work told me I would enjoy it and I have been coasting along ever since. I have met some nice women on there and I have come across some women I would like to meet but I have no idea what to write when I message people so I usually don't. I get alot of funny ideas from reading profiles though.
11) You used to have a point to make in your posts, what happened?
I still have things I want to say, but I try to stay away from voicing only my opinions. That makes for dry reading. However, I will express a few points pretty soon. I want to get back to my style.
12) Have you been to jail?
How the hell did you come to that question? Yes. I have been to jail. Nothing hardcore but it is a story worth posting. I'll get on it.
13) Why are you so against dating Desi girls?
It's not that I am against dating Desi women. I have been madly in love once in my life and it was with a Desi woman. I am sure there are Desi women out there I could get along with, I simply refuse to put on the "good boy" hat for anybody and that is generally the act they are looking for.
14) When you write about your dating experiences it seems like you are happy dating around, but when you get serious it is clear you want more.
I do want more. I am a romantic sap at heart. But I don't have "more" yet and I'm not going to dwell on it. The thing that makes me happiest in this world is a backscratch before bed from my lady.
15) I read your blog for a long time before actually meeting you and you don't come across the way I thought you would.
I'm not sure what that means, but if I am understanding you right it is because writing does not define me. I am who I am. I work on my car and watch Southpark before sitting down with a flowing thought and expressing it. Am I sheepish about telling people I write? No. Does that make me fake? No. It makes me... me. This is not something I went to school for, it is just what I am "good" at.
Also, when we met we were at Blue Label and I was having a hard time standing straight. Don't judge me.
16) How long does it take you to write a post?
Not long, I don't edit. The way it comes out is what you get. Yes, I do think the way I type.
17) You have touched on almost every subject but racism and sex. Why?
Stereotypes are funny. I can say that because I am a super minority. However, they are cliche so I venture down that path sparingly. As for sex, I am old fashioned. I don't talk about my sex life with anyone. Not even my closest friend knows what happens in my bedroom. When someone sees my other half I want them to see a strong woman, not the girl I am banging. It's a respect thing.
18) You did an article a long time ago about breaking up and what comes after. Do you still believe everything you said?
Yes and no. I still believe, with all of my heart, that you have to fight for love. However, I have learned that there is a difference between loving a person and loving the idea of a person. What I am saying is that after we break up we often see in that person only good things... the things we wanted them to be. Knowing the difference is the hard part.
19) Do you still have the first thing you ever wrote?
No. But I can tell you what it was. My Sociology professor wanted me to give a presentation about the "Disneyization of Society" and I thought it was complete bullshit. So when I took the stage I proceeded to express how remedial I thought she was and I challenged her to step into the real world where people die violently and marriages end more often than not. I have never failed so hard in my life.
20) You seem very serious sometimes.
I can be yeah. I suppose it depends on when you catch me. I am right this moment anyway. Isn't that normal?
